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Dr Sunita Sah 

What if defiance wasn’t a flaw, but a skill? In this episode, Dr. Sunita Sah—physician, behavioural scientist, and author of Defy—shares how reclaiming agency and redefining what it means to say “no” can change the trajectory of our lives. Raised to equate goodness with compliance, Sunita’s journey is a powerful reminder that being agreeable often comes at a cost: to our integrity, our well-being, and our sense of self.

We explore the psychology behind why we say yes when we mean no, the invisible social pressures that shape our decisions, and why discomfort is a sign—not of weakness, but of wisdom. Sunita offers a practical five-stage framework for living in alignment with your values, and explains how simple tools like pausing before responding or speaking to yourself in the third person can help you make braver, truer choices.

This conversation is a compassionate guide for people-pleasers, quiet rebels, and anyone who has ever struggled to hold their ground. A bountiful life, as Sunita reveals, isn’t lived without tension—it’s one where that tension is honoured, examined, and transformed into something meaningful.

Guest Bio: 

Dr. Sunita Sah is a physician, behavioural scientist, and Professor of Management and Organizations at Cornell University. She is internationally recognised for her research on defiance, decision-making, and ethical behaviour under pressure. A former physician and military officer turned academic, Sunita blends medical insight with behavioural science to explore how we reclaim agency in systems that reward silence and compliance. Her new book Defy offers a practical roadmap to saying no when it matters most—and living a life that’s truly your own.

In This Episode, You’ll Discover:

  • Why defiance is essential to a meaningful life

  • The difference between compliance, consent, and true defiance

  • How to find and clarify your personal values

  • The hidden social pressures behind people-pleasing and “yes” culture

  • Five stages of ethical defiance (from tension to action)

  • Quiet defiance, false defiance, and performative rebellion

  • Saying no with grace—and without over-explaining

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